I’m willing to guess that you’re a woman focused on self-growth and assurance. If not, you wouldn’t be reading this article. Am I right? 

Before you start being too hard on yourself, please know that self-assurance isn’t something you’re born with. It’s formed based on healthy habits that we have created and developed over time. So if you’re not feeling too self-assured lately, you can change that. 

What is self-assurance and what does it even mean to feel self-assured? Here are some fool-proof ways to feel self-assured that you can practice in your own life to boost your own confidence and help yourself feel more self-assured.

1. Manifest. I love the quote that says “Imagine your highest self and start showing up as her.” I’m a huge believer in manifesting. Manifesting requires you to embrace the power of positive thinking. When you manifest, you’re putting positive energy in the world which can bring a sense of hope.

2. Increase your ability to receive. So vague right? But ask yourself, “how is what I’m doing setting me up for what I say I want? Is watching TV for 10 hours a week helping my dream of writing that book or starting that business?” Make decisions today for your future self at the expense of your current self. I believe that the more you know what you want in life, the better you’re able to gauge what to accept from other people that serves you in a purposeful way. The more you know and learn what you want, you start to trust yourself and your decisions.

3. Challenge your negative thoughts. We all have them. Doubts will come, and when they do, try your best to doubt your doubts; challenge them. When you find that you’re catastrophizing or jumping to conclusions, a technique in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy  known as cognitive restructuring can help. Ask yourself, “ What evidence do I have that this is true?” Look for the proof, and if it’s not there, then don’t worry about it. 

4. Learn more. How is learning more going to increase self-assurance you ask? Well, the more we know, the more confident we feel. Think about the one thing you know the most about and having to give a speech or teach people about it. You’d feel confident in your ability to speak on it, I imagine. Inability or lack of knowledge tends to promote self-doubt. So if you want to feel more self-assured, increase your knowledge. Listen to podcasts, read a book, take a class, attend a conference, explore other methods of learning. 

5. Embrace difficulties. Nobody wants to experience pain or hardships. However, I strongly believe the more we lean into difficulties, the more we are building our muscle for resiliency, which increases our ability to bounce back from a difficult situation.

6. Ditch victim mentality. Our mind is one of our greatest assets. Train it to see that life is happening for you and not to you. Ask yourself, “what is this teaching me? This sucks, but how can I learn from this and improve?”

7. Express gratitude. When you adopt an attitude of gratitude, you’re leaving little room for complaining. Feeling grateful doesn’t have to mean things are going right all the time, feeling grateful is recognizing that things aren’t perfect and knowing that we get to decide the mindset we’re going to have.

None of these tips are sexy, I get it.  Over time, the more you build positive self-affirming traits, you’ll notice an increase sense of self-assurance. So, I’m curious to know, how do you feel self-assured?